Wednesday, June 25, 2008

Giving Up...

I am so confused right now. I don't know where to go. I mean professionally, I am fine. Emotionally I am not.  I guess it is really just the fact that I have once again put myself in a position of starting over, within 6 months of having done it previously. 

At least in Worcester I had Jeremy. I didn't feel as alone then as I do now.  There was a point in time, previous to this, in which I didn't care if I went out or not. Didn't care about meeting new people, didn't really want to meet new people either. I don't rightly know if I was happier at that time or not... but I do know that at this time I am just... confused. Confused, tired, stressed out and lonely.

Maybe I'll make for a good "Crazy Cat Lady". I just feel like giving up the ghost. Go through my day, enjoy my work and let it be at that. Feelings suck and I know they will pass. I would just rather not feel them at all. 

Oh yeah, I am attempting a cold turkey quitting of smoking, this is day 2. Let's compound the trauma of major life changes even further is what I must be thinking I guess. 


- D

2 comments:

jered74 said...

Yes, going cold turkey right now is probably adding to the moodiness.

But you just moved to Boston. It ain't NYC, but it's a great town. Get out there and enjoy it!

And practice the art of Not sleeping with people you like. That's where friends come from...

Daemian said...

Hrrmmmm... not sleeping with people I like. Hrmmm.. thats a difficult challenge you suggest there. LOL.

Smart ass....

I miss you. :(